I have some news to share, and it’s not about the newest book in the Pee Alone series. Back in the fall I got a new job, which was perfect because my youngest entered the big, bad world of kindergarten at the end of August, and I had time to spare and a bank account to pad.
I won’t be talking much about this job because it’s at an elementary school, and while I clearly have no problem blasting details about my own kids all over the internet, writing about my students wouldn’t be cool, even for an oversharer like me.
I can say this: I love my new gig. It’s part-time, and I’m tutoring kindergarten through sixth grade students in both literacy and math. The kids are fun and earnest, and my literacy groups are almost like tiny little book clubs for kids, which is the coolest.
The math, though? Especially the sixth grade math? It’s hard.
This transition has been interesting, because while almost everything in my life is going well, my writing has taken a backseat to, well, life. I’m still cranking out Crock Pot Thursday recipes, because I’m slow cooking at least twice a week, and because in the same way I’m compelled to tell people how cheap something is that I’m wearing when they pay me a compliment – “I like your boots.” “Thank you! They were only $69.99 at Target!” – if I make a tasty recipe, I can’t help but share it.
My creative writing has slowed. Friends and readers have reached out, wondering if I’m ever going to post anything that isn’t a recipe. “I miss YOU,” one friend said, so to her and to those of you who have been with me for years, I’m offering a belated apology. I changed directions, not intentionally, but without explanation. I still find time to write, but it is less and less frequent these days.
I love writing humor, and I miss it.
That’s why I am extra excited about today’s announcement. While I may not be able to crank out clever blog posts with any regularity, when Jenn Mann, from People I Want to Punch in the Throat fame, New York Times Best Selling author, and the creator of wildly popular humor anthologies asks me to write an essay for her, I make it happen.
Remember I Just Want to Pee Alone? Well, my kids are in school now, so I get a chance to spend a little time in the bathroom solo, but for many mothers this plea is still fresh, and is still a dream many years away. For all parents who are either living the reality of children trying to climb into their lap while they’re on the throne, or are so far away from those years they can look back with a chuckle, the sequel to the best-seller is here.
I Still Just Want to Pee Alone is ANOTHER collection of hilarious and heartwarming essays from 40 MORE of the most kick ass mom bloggers on the web. It promises laughs and nods of solidarity, and essays in perfect length to read in the pickup line at school or at gymnastics practice. You’ll see yourself in these stories, and you’ll want to buy a copy for your best friend and your sister.
My essay is called “The Interview,” and it highlights how poorly I’d fare if I were to interview for the job of being a mom. Spoiler alert: exceedingly poor. I thought parenting was just eating chicken nuggets, but I didn’t know they would be cold nuggets with the breading sucked off.
Why didn’t anyone tell me?
With essays titled, “It’s Not Pee. It’s You.”, “Open Letter to My Daughter: My Mother was Right and You Should Think I Am, Too”, and “Let’s Piss-Off the Babies”, you know this book is going to be a good time. But wait! Before you race to Amazon to order your copy, think of the other parents in your life. Do they like to laugh, too? Shouldn’t you buy one for a friend?
Books make excellent gifts. They are nuggets of entertainment that smell like libraries and feel like comfort. They conjure up visions of warm blankets and steaming mugs of tea, or of warm beaches and sweating glasses of iced deliciousness.
Giving a book is giving an experience. Give someone the gift of I Still Just Want to Pee Alone, and you’re delivering laughter on paper, which in my opinion, is the best kind of laughter.
Wanna know who the funny ladies are in this book? Take a look see.
Jen Mann of People I Want to Punch in the Throat
Bethany Kriger Thies of Bad Parenting Moments
Kim Bongiorno of Let Me Start By Saying
Alyson Herzig of The Shitastrophy
JD Bailey of Honest Mom
Kathryn Leehane of Foxy Wine Pocket
Suzanne Fleet of Toulouse and Tonic
Nicole Leigh Shaw of Nicole Leigh Shaw, Tyop Aretist
Meredith Spidel of The Mom of the Year
Rebecca Gallagher of Frugalista Blog
Rita Templeton of Fighting off Frumpy
Darcy Perdu of So Then Stories
Christine Burke of Keeper of The Fruit Loops
Amy Flory of Funny Is Family (that’s me, you guys!)
Robyn Welling of Hollow Tree Ventures
Sarah del Rio of est. 1975
Amanda Mushro of Questionable Choices in Parenting
Jennifer Hicks of Real Life Parenting
Courtney Fitzgerald of Our Small Moments
Lola Lolita of Sammiches and Psych Meds
Victoria Fedden of Wide Lawns and Narrow Minds
Keesha Beckford of Mom’s New Stage
Stacia Ellermeier of Dried-on Milk
Ashley Allen of Big Top Family
Meredith Bland of Pile of Babies
Harmony Hobbs of Modern Mommy Madness
Janel Mills of 649.133: Girls, the Care and Maintenance Of
Kim Forde of The Fordeville Diaries
Stacey Gill of One Funny Motha
Beth Caldwell of The Cult of Perfect Motherhood
Sarah Cottrell of Housewife Plus
Michelle Back of Mommy Back Talk
Tracy Sano of Tracy on the Rocks
Linda Roy of elleroy was here
Michelle Poston Combs of Rubber Shoes In Hell
Susan Lee Maccarelli of Pecked To Death By Chickens
Vicki Lesage of Life, Love, and Sarcasm in Paris
Kris Amels of Why, Mommy?
Mackenzie Cheeseman of Is there cheese in it?
Tracy DeBlois of Orange & Silver